‘Omelette’ for a given value thereof

IMG_1074Did you know that you can buy completely precooked bacon and not deal with the problem of discarding bacon grease ever again? Yes. It is, indeed, a thing one can do.

For when one is perpetually out of bagels, this is useful information. This is also prepared with my own preferences in mind: I can’t abide runny egg white, but I love when the yolk is still gooey.


  • bacon
  • shredded cheese
  • egg

Crack a couple eggs in a nonstick pan that is over medium heat. Go stare at your caffeinated beverage of choice to try to make it ready faster. When the eggs are showing completely white on the bottom and starting to firm up a bit, put your bacon and cheese and chives or veggies or whatever if you want them in the middle.

Use a flat spatula to flip part of the eggs over so the fillings are contained in egg. If you do it softly, you won’t break the yolk. Cook it another couple minutes to let cook through, and serve. Feeds one.

It is vaguely omelette-like! Not necessarily as pretty, but it is delicious eggs that taste like bacon, so who cares?

Avocado thing

One of the things I really love for either brunch or whatever you call it when your second meal of the day is at 4pm is avocado and egg. The most complicated part of the whole thing is buying two avocados that’ll be perfectly ripe on the same day. Mostly I try to find ones that are the same color and then leave them on the counter until they’re that dark green that means they’re the perfect ripeness.


  • avocado
  • 2 eggs
  • salt
  • pepper
  • paprika

It’s incredibly simple: cut the avocado in half and discard the pit. At this point I usually make a little tinfoil nest for the avocado half to keep it upright, but if you have relatively steady hands, it might not be an issue. Score each avocado half a bit, then crack an egg in each one. You probably want medium eggs for this unless you have a very large avocado, because you’re going to get some spillover. The yolk fits neatly into the hole left by the pit, though, so that’s cool.

Top with salt, pepper, and paprika to taste and bake for 20 minutes at 425°F. They taste incredibly rich and creamy and indulgent.